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According to dating coach Fran Greene in her chat to Elite Daily, the first step to a successful long-distance relationship is discussing how it actually affects you when you’re physically apart: “It is so hard, yet so important, to talk with your partner about your feelings about the separation.

I had a lot to say about the elaborate costumes and very little to say about the animals wearing them ("Here is a …

small dog"), but I gave caring-about-pets one last try. Because the thing about judging a dog costume contest is that you are literally being asked to which is the opposite of having them forced upon you in the wild with the expectation that you'll care.

After announcing the grand champion and the runners-pup, the dogs and I parted ways.

Pets shed and smell bad and destroy things that you own.

They are needy and drool-y, and they do not speak any language fluently.

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