I absolutely adore the guy I'm dating but I'm not willing to put all of my time and effort into him if it isn't going to amount to anything, and it's too early to tell. A whole entire date (which she was honest about when asked)! The important thing is that you've established exclusivity , so this shouldn't come up as an issue again.
Her actions have given you an indication as to her views on relationships. A lot of people on here will say that this is totally fine because you weren't exclusive yet, or that she "shouldn't put all her eggs in one basket," but I disagree.Some more details: Known timeline (I'm trying to convey how much time we spend together, and how recent some of these things have happened):8/4: Met at a party and went on a date the next day, at this time she was talking very casually to the guy she went on a date with on 9/6(Insert 20 dates)9/6: She goes on date with other guy, apparently he was trying to go on a date with her since 8/4 but schedules didn't align9/7: She invites me to hang out with her and her friends for a night out9/8: We go 1 on 1 to celebrate her birthday, nice intimate dinner9/9: Her birthday party where I'm her 19/10: Hang out all afternoon/night, have "exclusive" conversation, and I learn about this other date9/11 and beyond: Planning to hang out 1 on 1 today, and tomorrow at least (which is almost a week straight every day)So you weren't exclusive and she decided to check one more option and when she checked she decided "You're the one let's be exclusive" so honestly what's the problem? If I am interested in seeking a relationship ➡ date one person at a time and give each a fair shot. It doesn't matter how much she likes you, she's not going to put all her eggs in one basket until she knows for sure you're on the same page. I'm going through a similar thing at the minute so I can relate to this girl. Honestly...maybe she was worried that you guys weren't becoming exclusive yet so she decided to go on a date with that guy to sort of keep her options open in case you ended up playing her. I am really, truly, usually the person who says stuff like "well if she wasn't putting you first or thinking about you, that's not good enough" but I think this situation is definitely different. Just make sure she closes the door once and for all with that other guy. If people were exclusive with every single person from the first date and until things fizzled out it could take decades to find someone you're compatible with.My point is that two different dating cultures exist and both cultures are common. I went through the same thing with my BF, we "dated" for 5 months before becoming exclusive, fast forward 3.5 years and we're living together and planning marriage and kids. I've been dating this guy for around three months but I've talked to other people/met up with other people (flirty- but no sex). If she had any real interest in that other guy, she would have found a way to go on a date with him instead of putting it off for a month but she didn't. You're within your rights to want someone who falls head over heels in love with you from the first date - but to be honest that might be a tall order, and those sort of people don't tend to be the most emotionally stable anyway.I don't think anyone is at fault here, just a lesson to be learned about open dialogue.Yeah, if I'm at a month and 20 dates and a guy hasn't expressed interest in being my boyfriend, I'm assuming it's because he doesn't want to be my boyfriend.