Dating a southern man

” no starter, or main course just a sprint through to dessert.

The Shallow Man is risking a storm of abuse by bringing this up again, but, I’ve been told repeatedly by expat women, even as recently as yesterday (thank you Vittoria) that Dutch men are tighter than a virgin female flea.

” Which brings me to the subject of today’s post, seven deadly mistakes made when dating a Dutch man.

The Shallow Man has met many an expat lady that has been on dates with Dutch men that have not led to happy endings.

If you are hoping for a happy ending that night, pay the entire bill, he’ll be so overjoyed he might even propose marriage.

Due to the Dutchman’s love of money, they will not be impressed if during your date that you order bottled water or even worse San Pellegrino, which is the Ferrari of bottled water and is not cheap.

In other words, denim, shapeless boots, a top that clashes so badly with the rest of the outfit that you’d think Stevie Wonder was their personal stylist, and hair that would make a perfect nest for any passing bird.

If you, as an expat woman, turn up for your date, as is normal in most countries, in a nice outfit, stylishly cut shoes, makeup and styled hair, your Dutch date will have a minor heart attack.

He is likely to ask you what that stuff is on your face, and if you are planning to attend a wedding after the date.

Therefore, at considerable risk to my bespoke tailored three-piece suit wearing self, I have put together a list of deadly mistakes to avoid when dating Dutch men.

My advice will no doubt upset some, and if I am captured by a posse of angry Dutch men with lion king hairstyles and am forced to sit through hours of music from Tiesto, Fedde La Grand and Armin van Buuren, I’ll look into the eyes of my enemies and shout, sodemieter op, jullie domme kakkers! Dutch men, are probably the luckiest of their species on planet earth.

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